Random Thoughts 24

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! or in my case merry new year. Lol. Hope that everyone has a good one. Stick to your goals this year. Don't worry about whateveryone else thinks of you just do what you do best.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 23

Hey! As most of you know I should have been gone by now and I'm still here, but as I found out I might be leaving this coming Thursday, but it depends on a lot of stuff. I'm just waiting on my husband. He told me that he wants to come back home and get all of his stuff and then he wants me to go down with him. I'm getting really frustrated about all of it. I just wish that he could make up his mind about everything. I just wanna get outta my moms house and whatever. i love my mom to death and whatever but I seriously need to get out on my own. I can't wait until I can finally start living on my own. I figure that if I don't get outta here in the next couple of weeks then I'm just going to find a job and an apartment and get outta my moms house and not tell anyone where I'm going until my husband can decided on what he wants to do. But anyways.... I'm gunna go.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 22

Hey! I saw this totally awesome movie last night. It's called Sleepers. It's a totally messed up movie but the end of it is so worth it. It's one of my top movies now. I think that everyone should see this movie. I can't explain what the movie is about but everyone has to see this movie. Unless you have a queezy stomach. Then I'd advise you not to watch it. I thought that it was a good movie though. But anyways... The best movie ever!!!!!!!!! I was sorry that I didn't see it before now. I have to thank a friend for that. So THANK YOU! Anyways.... Only one more week and I'm outta Hicksville, USA. I can't wait. But anyways.... Good mood not going to spoil it by posting my problems. Don't really see the point. Anyways...
"This isn't awkward at all."
"Then what do you call it?"
"blowing off steam!" ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Love you guys.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 21

Hey! I'm just hanging out with friends. Having a good time. I haven't really slept yet. But oh well. I'm having a good time. I can't wait until this weekend. This might be my last blog for a while. But it depends on a lot of things. I know that I'm busy this weekend and it might be my last weekend home. But it depends on a lot of things. But anyways.... I so totally can't wait until this weekend. But any who... I hope that everyone had a good Christmas and I hope that no one gets too wasted on New Years. I know that I'm not going too... Have a great holiday everyone. I'll keep you posted on everything that is going on.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 20

Hey! I'm just hangin out with everyone. I'm having fun. I can't wait until Saturday. Me and a couple of friends are going to the movies. We agreed on going to see I am Legend. I'm looking forward to it. But anyways... I probably missed the phone call from my husband tonight. Oh well. I'll just talk to him tomorrow. Not a whole lot to blog about tonight.


~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 19

Hey! In my last blog I told everyone that I wasn't going to be posting for a while. Well I was wrong, I was suppose to go see my husband for the holidays and that didn't happen. So I got to spend christmas with my family. Which was good but I would have liked to spend it with my husband. Oh well. I'm leaving for North Carolina in about 2 weeks. Maybe even less than that. I still have a lot of packing to do. Yay! Not. Anyways.... speaking of packing I'm gunna go do that. Catch u later.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 18

Hey! I know that I said that my last post was going to be the last one for a while but as somethings turned out I was wrong. I'm stuck in NY for another couple of weeks. Oh well. This way I get to spend my last Christmas at home with my family. Not all of my family but the ones that are really important to me. Most of my friends that went to college are home now. I'm having a blast with everyone. I'm glad that I didn't leave when I was suppose too only because I'm glad that I get to spend time with all of my friends. They are on a quest at the moment and it's a very weird one. I can tell you all that now. I think that it's kind of amusing. But anyways... I hope that everyone has a good holiday. I'm glad that I get to spend it with my family. I'm not too happy about not getting to spend the holidays with my husband. As a friend of mine said, shit happens when you party naked. Is that not the best saying that you've heard? I think that it's awesome and it's so true if you really think about it. anyways... good mood. g2g.

~hearts~ Me

Random Thoughts 17

Hey! This is going to be my last post for a while. I'm leaving and where I'm going I'm not going to have access to a computer. I've told almost everyone now. For those of you who haven't found out yet I'm really sorry that I didn't tell you. I don't really know what else to say. I thought that I was going to be spending christmas at home and I'm not going to be now. It really sucks. I hope that everyone has a great holiday. I know that part of my family is going to be devistated, but I can't really do anything about it. I know that I'm really depressed about it. I mean in a way I want to be with my husband but in another way I want to be with my family for the holidays. I'm going to miss all of my friends that are around. At least I'll get to say good bye to them before I leave. I think that this all sucks but I can't really do anything about it. I found out tonight that my husband is leaving for Iraq in September. Not a whole lot I can do about that either. I'm going to be on my own trying to make it on my own again. I know that I'll have the support of my family and friends but they won't be there. I'm going to have to try and keep in touch with everyone. Not a whole lot more to say. I'm gunna go.

me

Random Thoughts 16

As most of you can figure out I haven't written in a while. The reason that is, is because I got really sick. I had a sinus infection. I couldn't really move and I couldn't really do anything. It hurt just to move around. I'm feeling better now. I'm glad that I'm feeling better. I'm working on getting completely rid of this. I feel better enough to move around and get stuff done. I packed my room today. It's a lot of hard work but it's getting done. I was going to do it a while a go but I ended up getting sick and I couldn't really do anything like I said before.
I can't wait until the holidays. I miss all of my friends. Everyone of them is getting a christmas present from me. At least I think that I got everyone. I'll figure that out when christmas gets here. anyways... can't wait to see everyone.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 15

Hey! Today was not a good day for me. As most of you have read my blog. You know whats going on. I'm having a better night. I just made this dessert thing and it's so good. I would recomend it to anyone. I have one person to thank for that. Thanks a bunch! I have a feeling though that it's going to make me fat, but it's so good. I ate part of it already. I was suppose to save it for Wed. but it's all good. I had to try it and make sure that my family would like it. I think they are going to get addicted to that stuff. It's called Banoffi Pie. It's so good. It takes a while to make but it's all worth it in the end. I can't wait to eat the rest of it. Like seriously.
Now I know why you love it so much(person that recomended it). I don't name names on here so if your reading this you know who you are. Again thanks a bunch.
Happy Holidays to everyone. Even if I don't like you right now. Only 10 more days and my husband will be home. I'm looking forward to it. I will finally get to spend the holidays with all of my family. For everyone reading this, don't expect a new blog written by me on thursday. I'm really busy that day. I won't have time to post a new blog. Just to let everyone know. Can't wait until the holidays. Can't wait to see all of my friends again. I'm going to have a blast with everyone. I love you all.

~hearts~ me

One Very PISSED Off Chick

Hey! Have you ever gotten an offline message from someone that really pissed u off? I just got 2 of them from my husbands dads girlfriend. Here is what they say: suzette frederick (12/7/2007 8:58:51 AM): why did u take me off jonnys emailin address so did u tell him u have a boyfrien in ohioX-(
panda14760 (12/10/2007 1:25:18 PM): u no i was just tellin u what i was told and i also jonny the same thng and ur the one whos pissed off at the world i tried nothin but ur friend and look at the way u treat me andn jon u shit on us. then turn around and keep jonny away from his own familyso as far as im concerned ur nothin but a hore in my book.
Which none of what she said is true. And if she feels that way about me fine. I don't really care but she needs to stay the hell out of my husband and I's business. I don't give a shit about his family anymore. I tried to be nice to them. Well I'm done with that. His whole family wants to cause problems between us. They think oh well they're really happy and I'm not so I'm going to screw up thier life. I don't fuckin think so. I'm done with all of this shit. I'm ready to go live with my husband and get outta here and not deal with that stupid fuckin bitch anymore. I'm done with it all. When my husband calls me again I'm telling him everything. I don't care anymore. He's gunna be pissed too. I'm just done with all the 4 year old shit. It needs to end. Like now. I'm done.

Random Thoughts 14

Hey! Today was really boring. I had to sit in a car for 5 hours. It sucked. But I guess thats what I get for saying that I will go with my mom to go get my brother. I got told that I wasn't allowed to smoke in my mothers car. So 2 and a half hours with no cig, i pretty much died. But I made it.
I talked to my husband today. I guess that people have been saying a lot of crap about me again. My husband called me friday night and told me everything that had been said. Go figure. I hate people at this point. Like seriously. I can't wait until I leave this place. No more drama. Hopefully. At least I won't have to deal with all of the drama thats been going on here. I guess that I can't ever leave my moms house without someone finding a way to tell everyone that I'm cheating on my husband. Whatever. My husband and I know the truth. I'm not cheating on him. I just think that it's bull shit that everyone has to stick their nose in our business. I'm getting really sick and tired of that too. Anyways... I'm gunna go.

~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 13

Hey! As most of you know, my husband is coming home on the 20th of december. Although I found out today that he's not coming home until the 21st. Which totally sucks. But theres not a whole lot I can do about it. Anyways... I'm really looking forward to getting the holidays done and over with. Anyways... as most of you know, I'm planning on having a huge wedding in June and at this point i'm just about to say forget it. I don't even care anymore. I've been stressed out enough I don't need to add anything else to the stress about. I hope that everything gets better.
I don't really have anything to talk about so I'm gunna go.
~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 12

Hey! I got a big suprose today. I had called my husband and left him a message on his phone and not even an hour later he called me. I wasn't expecting to hear from him until at least friday. He called me and told me that he wasn't suppose to be on his phone but he wanted to hear my voice before he went to sleep. Isn't that cute? As most of you know, I will be home for the holidays this year. I found out yesterday that I am leaving on one of my friends birthdays. I feel really bad about it but I can't do anything about it.
My husband had also informed me that we might have to find our own appartment to the place that were going. I'm not too thrilled about this. If we do have to find our own place it's going to be a nice place thats close to the beach, hopefully. I'm going to make sure that we can have pets in the house too. That is something that I really want. I have a cat and I want her to come with me to where I'm going.
I can't wait until the holidays are over. No more stress about the holidays. It will be where am I going to live? Not really a good sign. I will find out more when I talk to my husband again.
~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 11

Hey! So I talked to my online friend again today. We have come to an agreement that me getting married was my choice and that they are happy for me. They do not want to lose me as a friend. I think that if they were looking for something more than just a friendship they would have tried something 7 years ago. They didn't try anything then, I don't think that they would try anything now. They give me their honest opinion on stuff and I appreciate it. I don't think that they would try anything stupid. I have a family who will protect me if they try to hurt me in anyway. They don't know where I live. I don't think that they will try and hurt me becasue I am married and they do respect that. There is a 6 year age difference between us. They may care about me but they have told me that the physical attraction isn't there. They also told me that they don't want to risk a friendship that has been built over a 7 year spand.
My husband will be home in 16 days. I'm going to tell him everything that has been going on. I don't want to tell him over the phone because it will just cause more problems between us. Not something I want for the holidays. So I figure if we talk when he gets home that we can just work it all out that way. I don't want anyone to be there when this conversation happens. I just want it to be me and my husband. Because we can not keep running to our parents over every little detail. We are growing up. It may not seem like it but we are. We are going to have to face some of the hard facts of life. But we will have each other to do it with. I know that I don't have to go about all of this alone but I would like too. Because I know sooner or later that I'm going to have to do it on my own anyways.
Thanks for the comments.
~hearts~ ME

Random Thoughts 10

Hey! To everyone that reads my blog. Yes I think that it's awsome that I'm going to be home for Christmas. Thank you for all of the comments that you have left. I told everyone that they were going to get a kick out of what I posted last. Some of you were like OMG! But then you got it, and it's hilarious.
Anyways, I got the best Christmas present that I could have asked for. I found out that one of my friends really does care about me. I know that my family cares a lot about me too. And I'm greatful for that. I really am. I think thats the best thing that you could ever get for christmas is knowing that someone really does care about you. I know that all of my other friends care about me but this is a different kind of feeling. I guess that I have a lot of thinking to do.
Anyways, I asked one of my friends if they thought that I was obsessed with one of my other friends. They told me no, that I was just trying to fill a void in my life. Maybe they're right. Maybe I just had a really bad judge of charater. Maybe I just have to figure out what I really want in life. I don't know. I know that I love my husband to death but I also know that I really care about my other friend(the one that told me that they do care about me). I know that I love my husband to death but sometimes I don't trust him. Is that a problem? I don't know. Maybe it is. I know that he'll be home in 17 days and whatever but sometimes I just can't believe anything that he says. I think that that's a really big problem too. Maybe it's not my husband that I don't trust. Maybe it's just his family. I don't know.
If anyone has any imput on this please feel free to leave a comment.

Random Thoughts 9

Hey! I finally got to talk to a friend of mine. It was like 3 days before I could talk to him again, but I finally caught him online. We had a long converstation about whats been going on. Then I sent him this survey thing that I had gotten sent to me, and he answered it all truthfully. I think that it's really amusing. But it's really sweet in a way. He's a really good guy and if I wasn't married I'm tellin ya, he would be the one that I had my heart set on. Oh speaking of being married my husband comes home again in 17 days. Then on Januaray 3rd, 2008 I finally get to go live with him. I'm very excited about it. I finally get to leave Hicksville, USA! Hopefully the place I go isn't another Hicksville, USA. I have something that I want to share with everyone. Leave a comment on what you think.

This is so hard for me. I really shouldn't be asking u. I feel shy but I want it so bad, don't get me wrong it's just that I haven't had it for a long time. I could already feel it going in so hard and coming out so soft and wet. No one has to know about this. I need it. I'm desperate and I would do anything right about now to get some. You must think I have a lot of nerve asking you this, but I can feel my tongue around it sucking all the juice out until there is no more left this has been on my mind all day long and I hope I’m not being forward. I'm usually not like this, but... Can I have some gum?

Just remember a friend of mine sent this too me. It wasn't my bright idea to come up with this. Hope you all enjoy it. ~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 8

Hey! As one of my friends said to me today, no matter what you do control your life if you want a change in life you have to do it yourself. To tell everyone the truth, personally I think that is great advice. The only way that you are going to have change in your life is to do it yourself. Believe me, making some changes are really hard but sometimes you have to do it. Anyways... the holidays are coming. Hope everyone has a good Christmas. I know that I'm going to have a good Christmas this year. My husband is coming home for the holidays. I get to be with my family. I thought that I wasn't going to be. I acctually get to spend my last Christmas at home with all of my family. I'm excited about it. I can't wait until Christmas gets here. I'm going to have gifts for everyone. Including friends that I don't see very often. Have a happy holiday. Don't get too wasted for New Years!

Random Thoughts 7

Hey! As most of you know. I'm leaving in 19 days. It is now December 1, 2007. I can't believe how fast this year has gone by. First thing I know is that it's January 1, 2007 and now it's december. Anyways... I've been talkin to someone for a long time and they left me an offline message saying "sorry about the ciao Bella thing, I hadn’t even realized, sorry. Don’t worry about the blog thing, its cool it’s just not something I had expected and you took me a bit by surprise. Whatever happens stay the way you are, you’re a lovely girl and it’s a shame you don’t live a little closer" That makes me wonder about a lot of things. Like for instance about me getting married. I'm starting to think that I shouldn't have gotten married and followed my heart to the full extent. I don't know what to do now. Only because now I know how someone really feels about me even though he tells me all the time that he doesn't really care about me the same way. Anyways... I don't plan on changing anytime soon. I will always be me. If I do change a little bit hopefully it will be for the better. Too all of my friends, I will definatally keep in touch. ~hearts~ me

Random Thought 6

Hey! I know that I haven't posted in a while but my husband had come home for thanksgiving. As most of you know, He already left again. But in 21 more days we will be together again, and this time I finally get to go with him. I'm just glad that I have friends and family to help me get through all of the hard times. I'm thankful for that. I know that thanksgiving is over but there are so many things that I am thankful for. I don't know how I will show all of it but sooner or later I will. Hopefully. I hope that everyone has a good christmas and New Years. Whats everyones New Years resultion this year? Mine is to lost a lot of weight and have a happy time with my family. I guess thats it for now. laters. ~hearts~ me

Random Thoughts 5

Hey! My husband is coming home tomorrow. As most of you know. I can't wait. Has anyone ever been stood up by someone? I know that I have. I was talking to a friend of mine today and he ended up getting stood up. I kinda feel bad for him, but I did find something else out tonight. I started calling him my teddy bear like 7 years ago and some other girl started calling him that but I was the one that started it all. Which made me happy. He's the second love of my life. He's been there for me through most of my life. Like I said before we've been friends for 7 years. I still can't believe that it's been that long but it's as long as I've known my husband for too. My husband is the first love of my life, just to all of those wondering. I have a feeling that if I never met my husband that I would have ended up marrying the second love of my life and if your reading this I mean it. Don't take any affence to it. I hope that you don't stop talking to me because of what I just said. Anyways.... for the rest of my friends reading this PLEASE don't tell my husband about this. I've kept it secret from him. I know thats not how a relationship should work I just haven't gotten around to telling him yet. I will just give me some time. My day was pretty good as most of you can tell. I mean I've been pretty stressed out lately but since I talked to my friend(not metioning names), my day has gotten better, and I'm not so stressed out anymore. I thought that I was going to end up losing a good friend today because I was being witchy(the nice version). But we ended up talking and made it good. Anyways... I hope that everyone has a good turkey day and a good holiday. love ya lots.

Random Thoughts 4

Hey! Not a whole lot going on here. So this is just something for me to ramble on again. My life has been pretty boring. I can't wait until Christmas. I'm leaving. Maybe for good, maybe not. I don't really know. But anyways... 3 days and my husband is home. Yes, I'm still counting down days. He'll be home on tuesday. I can't wait. I'm getting everyone a chistmas gift. I don't care what anyone says. I just can't wait until he comes home. I miss him as most of you know already. Anyways... I've been listening to a song lately, and it reminds me of why I have all of my friends and it also reminds me of all the memories that I have with them. I hope that everyone has a great holiday. Even if you don't celebrate thanksgiving, or christmas. It doesn't matter. Everyone celebrates something different. Anyways... can't really think of anything else to say. love ya all.

Random Thoughts 3

Hey! I'm in a really good mood tonight even though I didn't hear from my husband, but it's all good. I made this kick ass dinner tonight. Who ever thought that maple and pork would go together. I never thought about it. But I'm tellin ya it's so good. If anyone wants the recipe I have it. I mean it's a really kick ass dinner. I thought that it was going to be discuting but it was really good, and it's so easy to make. but anyways... my husband comes home in 5 days. I'm excited. I can't wait to see him. I'm pretty sure all of you are getting sick of hearing about it but I don't care. My real friends probably won't care either. I can't wait until the holidays are here. That way they can get over faster. But the only sucky thing is that my husband has to leave again after the holidays. but thats okay. nothing can get me down right. I love everyone for what they are doing. Even if I don't agree with it. but hey everyone makes mistakes. They get over it. But yea. now I'm just rambling on about stupid stuff. love ya all.

Random Thoughts 2

Hey! I'm so glad that I have friends. I mean a friend of mine from england is giving me a lesson on my heiritage. Only because he's like a superwiz. But it's cool. And to all of my friends that are in college, i'm so glad that we're friends. It just disappoints me that I'm leaving in a month. I hope that I will get to see everyone before I go. And when I find out where I'm gunna be I'm gunna e-mail all of you guys and give u my address. Or else I'll call you. which ever is easier. I'm in a good mood tonight if u all can't tell. I'm not sure why though. Maybe it's because I'm learning about my heiratiage and that I finally know what real friends I have. My husband will be home on tuesday. which is 6 days away. I'm so excited. So too all of my friends out there don't try and see me on tuesday. I'm gunna be with my husband and most of u know what that means. But I'm definatally getting everyone something for christmas. Everyone is going to get thier christmas presents early though only because I'm not going to be here for christmas. anyways... love ya. ciao for now

Random Thoughts

Hey! has any one ever told you that you have a bad habbit of some sort? I've been told that. My bad habbit is that I smoke. But face it when I get stressed out I smoke and it keeps me from throwing things. Some people do that and it irriates me. But hey whatever gets your frusterations out. I guess that everyone is different. Some people smoke others deal with it a different way. Anyways.... As everyone knows I'm married now. I'm pretty wrapped up in it, but my family will always come first. No matter what. I don't really care what anyone else thinks of me anymore. The only thing I have to worry about now is what my husband thinks of me and of what my family thinks of me. I mean yea I have friends but they could call me fat and I could just say yea I know I am and I don't really care. I mean yea I've been trying to lose weight but it's not that easy. Some people tell me that I'm not but whatever thats their opinon. Not mine. Yes I would like my friends to be honest with me but not to the point of it will start a fight. I hope that all of my friends understand that and don't get mad at reading this. Anyways... 7 days until I see my husband. I can't wait. anyways.... just rambling on again. Stupid thoughts. Can't get away from them.

family

Hey people! my husbands comin home in 7 days. What a trip this has been. Everytime he leaves a bunch of shit starts then it's right before he comes home again that it all starts all over again. But that was when I was living with my in-laws. Not a whole lot has happened to me since then. Except for the fact of my dad acctually was talkin to me again. I haven't heard from him since June. The day I graduated from High School. Then before that, I don't know how long it had been. Thats pretty sad if you ask me. But thats okay because I have other people in my life that I know care about me. I mean somedays I feel like no one wants me but then it changes, because I start talkin to someone and they agree with me about almost everything. So I thought that its a good thing. Just to let everyone know, I'm not going to be around for christmas. My husband and I finally figured out what we were doing. Well more my husband than me but still. I just can't wait until he comes home. I miss him. But now I'm just rambling on about stuff, so I'm gunna go.

Siblings

Has anyone ever wished that they never had any siblings? well I went from having 1 sibling to 12 in a matter of months. How sad is that. But part of my family I can't stand. All they do is fight. And it's been like this for as long as I can remember. I can't stand it anymore. I have enough problems as it is. Then they come here and fight. Thats why I like it better when I have the whole house to myself. then it's quiet and I don't have to deal with all of the fighting. Which is nice. But anyways... my husband will be home in 9 days. I'm excited about that. I guess that I'm just frusterated today. I woke up and the fighting started. I'm ready to move outta my mom's house. I thought that living with my in-laws was bad. Yea right. That was a cake walk compared to all the fighting here. Don't get me wrong. I love my family to death. Right? but sometimes it can be frusterating. Now I see what my mom goes through every weekend. I thought that it was a bunch of bull but now that I'm starting to grow up alot. I see what it's like for everyone in the house. I'm sure that no one likes all the fighting. I just wish that there was something I could do. But it seems like every time I try to help, I just get yelled at for something. I don't think it's fair but everytime I get yelled at it is usually my fault. But why should I try and get anything right? Right. Anyways... I think this is long enough for today.

Holidays

As most of you know the holidays are coming up quick. I mean my husband is coming home in 10 days. I can't wait for that. I miss him so much. I caught myself bawling the other day. Thats how much I miss him. I mean don't get me wrong I miss all of my friends too. I can't wait to see at least part of them. I know that I can't see all of them. I keep trying but it's not working very well. I mean some of us keep in touch through e-mail and what ever, but thats ways off subject. Back to the holidays. Thanksgiving is coming. What is everyone thankful for this year? This year I'm thankful for everyone that helped me through the hard times and everyone that is still helping me through it all. I'm thankful for my husband being able to come home and I'm thankful for all of my friends that are okay and still alive. After thanksgiving comes christmas. the biggest holiday in America. I don't know about the rest of the world but I know that in america it's about getting gifts for everyone and spending time with your family. Which some people don't get to do. Some people don't celebrate christmas. They celebrate something else. which is cool because they get to spend time with family and everyone gets to see how they should act as a family.

It's been Hard

Hey everyone! As most of you know. My husband had come home and left again. I can't wait until he comes home again. I really miss him. He's only gone until christmas this time but it's still hard to get everything done with him gone. It's hard to deal with some stuff because he's gone. But watch when he comes home again everything will be fine and dandy. Being married isn't all peaches and cream though. Don't ever let someone tell you that it is. I found out the hard way, even though people tried to tell me that it was going to be hard. If everyone knows me they know that I didn't listen to that and I like to find things out the hard way. Its going to be hard though when I move away from everyone. But I have to start my own life now. I have excepted that so far. Today it snowed for the first time since last year. I hate the cold. I don't know about everyone else but I know that I hate the cold. Anyways... everyone have a good night.

What long 2 weeks

Hey people! as most of u know. i was dating someone. well thats not true anymore. I found out that he was cheating on me and i gave him the boot. If I ever see his face again he'll be sorry. I don't care if i go to jail or not. He doesn't deserve anyone good. I hope that one day he meets someone that will treat him like dirt like he did to everyone else. And as most of you know i was going to get a divorce. Thats not true anymore either. I worked things out with my husband. we decided to sit down and talk after a really big fight that we got into. But that besides the point. Anyways... My husband is gone again for another 60 days. He'll be home for christmas. Which is a good thing. Then I finally get to go with him. i'm looking forward to that. The day I got home I got told that one of my friends had gotten in a car accident. I was totally flipping out. But she's doing good now. Which I'm glad that she is fine. I hope that everyone reading this is not feeling sorry for me. I can take care of myself. I know that I have a lot of support from my family and friends. Which I do appreciate all the support that i'm getting. I'm just glad that my family is 100 percent supportive of what I do. Maybe not all the time but they are just trying to guide me in the right direction. Whcih is a good thing. I just can't wait until I can get out on my own and pay them back for everything that they have done for me in the past. They are trying to help me through a tough time right now. Which is greatly appreciated. Even if I don't show it right now. But sooner or later they will know that i appreciated all the help they gave me. To everyone reading this. I'm glad that u have been there for me. Through good times and bad.

The last Week

Well everyone heard about what happened in the last month, so to top it off here's the last week. Okay so monday I got in a fight with my in-laws (soon to be X-in-laws) but anyways... The cops got called. Then on tuesday I got punched in the face by someone. I don't like her anyways. So there were more cops involved. On my 18th birthday my mother and I got in a fight. I got to go buy a pack of cigs though. Thursday was my moms day off. I didn't really talk to anyone. Now it's friday and I got a call from my husband telling me that he's on his way home. Not really cool. So I have to face him tomorrow or something. Don't really know. Don't really care. I'm getting divorced. Anyways... Now my boyfriend is ditching me. I haven't talked to him since my birthday. Which is kinda sucky. I'm starting to think that he doesn't care about me anymore. I mean I haven't heard from him in 2 days. whatever right? So I guess that I'll try and catch him on tomorrow. I dont have a phone number to reach him at so I'll have to figure out a way to get a hold of him. I'm really worried. but yea thats been my week so far.

My Last Month

As most of my friends know, my life has been hell since June. Lets start with the last week of June. Okay so the last week of June. I was finishing high school. I graduated. The day before I graduated I ended up getting married. Big mistake on my part. I was only 17. I didn't know what I was thinking. I thought. Oh I wanna get married and start a family. WRONG! I don't want to start a family. Thats what I thought I wanted. I was wrong. I mean I was just getting outta high school for crying out loud. Then I graduated. So life wasn't that bad. But because I was married I couldn't do anything. So I hung out with my husband. I forgot completely about my family and went to go hang out with him. For the first two weeks we were married I think that I saw my mom for a whole two days. Not cool. So you would think right there that I there was a problem. No, I was 17 and stupid. Then my husband left for basic training. I knew that he had to go when I got married to him. DUH! I ended up getting left behind. No big deal right? Wrong. I ended up moving back home with my mother. We got into a big fight and i moved out, moved in with my in-laws. It wasn't bad until I started to get friends. Then it was "You're cheating on your husband... blah blah blah." Whatever. Let people think what they want. Then it all stopped for a while. Then someone moved in. We became friends. While he was living there things kinda got heated between us. Yea, we fooled around but it was nothing serious right? Not what my in-laws thought. Then he ended up getting kicked outta there. So I came home to visit my mom. Then I went back to my in-laws because I was suppose to go to south carolina with them. That didn't happen. We ended up getting in a huge fight. Because supposibly I made a movie with their cam corder. It wasn't a good movie either. But I know for a fact that I didn't do it. The fight got bad enough that the cops got called. So I ended up calling my mom and telling her to come get me. Now keep in mind, i'm only 17 and have no idea what the hell is going on. Well don't really know how to deal. So I moved outta there and moved back in with my mom. Then I'm home for not even 24 hours and I get punched in the face because "I'm obseced with some girls boyfriend." I don't even like her boyfriend. I haven't been able to stand him since the last time I hung out with this kid. Right? Yea. So I ended up calling the cops on her. So I've already seen cops twice in the last 2 days, right? yea. Then the day after that is my 18th birthday. I was so excited about turning 18. But no the day of my birthday my mom and I get into a fight about everything thats been going on. Whatever. So I got to spend my birthday alone. Not a fun time. Every year on my birthday something has to go wrong. Every year it's like that. I've finally started to hate my birthday. Maybe I was just born in a bad month. The only good thing about my 18th birthday was that I got to go buy a pack of cigarettes by myself. I didn't need anyones permission and I didn't have to ask my mother to buy me a pack. Finally. and on top of that my husband found out that I want to get divorced. Isn't that convient?